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Bob Barker Reveals He Was Yoda's Jedi Master
10/4/02 - William Grim
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Burbank, CA - In a stunning development that has all of Tinseltown talking, Bob Barker, gigagenarian emcee of the long-running TV game show The Price Is Right, revealed today that he was Yoda's Jedi Master when the diminutive green-skinned star of Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones first joined the Jedis as a Padewan Learner a long, long time ago in a galaxy far, far away.

"I couldn't be prouder of the little dude," said Barker from the set of Price during a break in taping. "I taught him how to control his emotions and to let the Force® work through him, but I let Ray Charles show him how to fly a spaceship in hyperdrive through an asteroid belt while blindfolded…Just kidding…No, seriously, the kid was a natural, the Ted Williams of the light saber."

Yoda is in seclusion at his Palo Alto ranch and could not be reached for comment. When questioned, his publicist remarked, "Respect I'm sure you do the families of Yoda and Bob Barker, so make not a statement at this time we will."

Although outwardly everything is calm at LucasFilms®, sources say privately that Star Wars guru George Lucas is furious at Bob Barker for the timing of his revelation, which not only detracts from the record-setting pace of Episode II's box office, but also is going to cause Episode I to be completely reshot to bring Bob Barker into the series' mythology. Lucas is said to be considering introducing Barker as a cheesy game show host who has a cable program in the underwater city of the Gungans on the planet Naboo. When Barker was informed of Lucas' alleged plans he smiled and said, "George, I am your father."

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