Pasadena Happy Face Mental Ward - Seventeen days into Clark Jines' camp out for Star Wars II tickets, Jines noticed a second line forming four feet away. "I was curious at first but did not think much of it." "The first week in line was easy." said Jines, "I had stored up on food and soda and was ready for the long haul." Into his second week he experienced hallucinations and stints of unconsciousness. During this period he was unconcerned that his "Camp Star Wars" had only been joined by one other person. Unable to talk due to severe dehydration, he did not communicate with his fellow camper nor the parallel line steadily growing beside him.
Day 35, while being urinated on by a homeless man, Jines heard a mutter about Hugh Grant from his line mate. "You must love him as much as I do" she said. Jines managed to prop himself up upon a pile of his own excrement to glance at the box office window where it read in very small letters "About a Boy". Jines, who no longer had enough body fluids to cry, attempted to roll over to the newly discovered Star Wars II line. Jines was discovered 3 days later in a dumpster behind a Taco Bell severely beaten.

Jines now communicates through the help of computer devices installed to his iron lung. "They tell me that this machine should be mobile just in time for Episode III." Jines tells us, "That Yoda really kicks some ass!"