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The Ultimate, 100% Accurate Gay Test
4/10/2004 - Matt Rouse
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Gay Test


No need for a blood test or lengthy therapist visit to find out if you're really a homosexual. Matt Rouse has developed this handy test promised to produce accurate results. Just answer these 20 questions and know for sure!

1) Have you ever found a guy attractive?
Never!
Just Once (And I was Drunk!)
A Couple Of Times
All The Time!


2) Have you ever kissed a guy?
Never!
Just Once (And I was Drunk!)
A Couple Of Times
All The Time!


3) Do you like Opera?
No way!
Some of it
Yes
I love it!


4) What's the Australian version of Syrah called?
What's a Syrah?
I know, but I forget...
Merlot
Shiraz


5) Do you like going to strip clubs (To watch women)?
Definitely!
Once in awhile
Rarely
No


6) Do you like beer?
Who Doesn't?
Not really
Once in awhile
No


7) Do you like the Trans-Siberian Orchestra?
The what?
I saw them, and HATED it
Eh, they're ok
I love them!


8) How many teams are there in the beginning of the NCAA basketball tournament?
64
32
I forget
No idea


9) Who's hotter, Tom Cruise or Brad Pitt?
They're both homos
Tom Cruise
Brad Pitt
It's a toss up


10) What's a better hand? A flush or a full house?
Full House
Flush
No idea. I don't play cards
They tie


11) Do you like Oprah?
I hate her so much
I respect her as a person
She has her moments
I love her!


12) Have you ever hugged a guy (Family members included)?
No
Yes
Once (And we were drunk)
All the time, we're very close


13) Finish this lyric : "She told me to come, but..."
"I was already there!"
"I don't have any hair!"
I forget
I don't like AC/DC


14) Finish this lyric : "Instead of kisses, we get kicks... Instead of treated..."
Uhhhhh
I forget (Been awhile since I've seen Annie)
It's right on the tip of my tongue
"We get tricked!"


15) Do you floss?
No
Not as often as I should
Sometimes
All The Time!


16) If you have urinals like : 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5, with guys at 1 and 5, which one do you use?
3
2 or 4
I don't use urinals
It really doesn't matter


17) Do you like cigars?
Yes
No
Sometimes
Rarely


18) How many pieces of jewelry do you wear other than a wedding ring and/or watch?
None
1
2
Mr. T has nothing on me!


19) Who won the first American Idol?
No clue, I hate that show
Kelly Clarkson
Clay Aiken
I forget


20) Do you like to dance?
Hell no
In clubs, yeah
I love to
If a lady wants me to


 

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