Cleveland, Ohio - It’s been a lonely life for Democrat presidential longshot Dennis Kucinich, the former mayor of Cleveland affectionately known as “Dennis the Menace,” who was recalled from office for being even more incompetent than Gray Davis. Now it looks like the longtime bachelor has finally made a “love connection,” and there hasn’t been this much heat generated in Cleveland since the last time the Cuyahoga River caught on fire.
Although there has been no official confirmation as of yet, officials at Buckingham Palace are already denying that Prince Charles has emailed a marriage proposal to the diminutive Buckeye pol. Royal watchers say that the veracity of the email is not in doubt since it has been officially denied. Broken Newz has obtained a copy of Prince Charles’ proposal, and our independent internet consultants have confirmed that the IP of the email originates from Prince Charles’ official website: www.Gay-Boys-in-Bondage.uk.
Kucinich said at a press conference this morning that while he is flattered at the Prince’s proposal and is seriously considering the offer, he is concerned that the Prince is already living with another man, Camilla Parker-Bowles.
“I just don’t know if I can be as butch as Camilla,” Kucinich said wistfully as he twirled his parasol while taking a walking tour of his working-class congressional constituency.
In a testy exchange with reporters outside of Windsor Castle today, Prince William said that if the press doesn’t stop printing accusations about his father being gay or bi-sexual, he will “swat their rumps with a birch switch and give them a right good public school buggering in the finest English tradition.”
