Berkeley, Ca. - Berkeley Institute of Javatology has released recent findings claiming Stonehenge may be the remains of a 5000 year old Coffee house.
"The Semi-nomadic people that populated the Salisbury Plain were known for their love of caffeine and social interaction. Said Dr. Scott Leva, "Newly discovered carvings suggest it may have been a Starbucks."
A spokesman for Starbucks has told us that these findings may not be entirely impossible. The origin of the coffee franchise is not fully known. Stories from the Bible talk of Jesus healing the lame with Caramel Macchiatos. Plato told tales of a large, yet now vanished race of warriors called the Frappuccines who were known to be extremely brutal, energetic, and to never sleep. There has always been vast speculation to the actual birth of Starbucks. All documents regarding the company's inception were lost in the great dry roast fire of 1849.
If these statements surrounding Stonehenge are true, then of course most of what we believed of the mysterious location is untrue. Tales of druid ceremonies, and extraterrestrial landing spots will seem more unlikely that usual. The largest misnomer would be the actual time taken to construct the 5000 year old Megaliths. Scientist had always believed the structure was pieced together over a 2000 year period. If the Starbucks theory is true, then of course we know the massive stone creation was built in a day.
